We Celebrate Knowing

Today, March 21st, is the one year anniversary of the day we spent in five appointments at the University of Iowa only to go home with a PDD-NOS (Autism Spectrum Disorder) diagnosis for Deane.  This is a day of celebration for me because knowing the answer to many of the questions and concerns is so liberating!  April is Autism Awareness Month and it will be celebrated around the year in so many ways but here are a few ways you can celebrate it:
Light It Up Blue - on April 2nd, homes and buildings around the world will "light it up blue" by placing blue lights in their exterior light fixtures. 
Learn What Autism Is - knowledge is always he first step to advocating for others

Help your kids become advocates for other kids with autism - Because every child is different, this is no easy matter, but a parent's attitude toward kids with special needs will shape their child's behavior.  There are a number books about autism for kids like Ian's Walk: A Story About Autism. You can explain:

• Children with autism need friends just like other kids
• People with autism need others to be patient with them because they may not communicate as easily or have trouble with sensory input that don't bother others
• Some people with autism have trouble with change of environment or schedule.  It helps to warn them and understand their behavior may be related to this.

Wear it on your sleeve (or shirt) - The puzzle has come to symbolize autism and can be found in ribbon form.  I would be happy to send a puzzle ribbon to anyone who would like (just tell me where to send it).  "The puzzle is said to symbolize the mystery and complexity of autism. The different colors and shapes represent the diversity of people and families living with this developmental disorder. The brightness of this awareness ribbon signals hope. Hope that through research we will soon identify the causes and a cure for autism. And hope that through increasing awareness of autism, with the disorder will lead fuller and more complete lives."
Participate in a Walk Now For Autism event - these are held all over the country at different times of the year.  It was held at the end of April in the Quad Cities.  Many smaller market walks are not listed on the linked site.
Specifically in our local area, we work with two great non-profits that serve kids with autism.  The Quad Cities Autism Center (providing ABA therapy to kids with autism) and Children's Therapy Center of the Quad Cities (who serve children with all types of disabilities) have both been extremely helpful in supporting Deane's growth in the last year.
In the year we have been living this autism family life, we have learned so much about what families endure.  We are extremely lucky for many reasons, the greatest of which is the transforming experience that has allowed us to more fully understand and help our son.

I plan to share more about our autism experience in the coming month.  We have to get celebrating!

Two Moments to Remember

I had two great moments this week that I don't want to forget.  Please note I'm inserting unrelated recent photos because I don't have any pictures of these moments...of course.

Discovering how to float balls over the air tubes at Rockford's children's museum

#1 On Thursday, Deane,Kate and I were running errands with my mom.  We went to a local mall which just happens to have a train that is large enough for adults and children to ride in.  It drives through the mall and is a favorite activity of Deane's.  To me, favorite activity usually equals meltdown upon having to discontinue the activity. 


on Niabi Zoo train - another favorite activity, but this year, it appears we don't like the whistle

On Thursday, I was prepared to sit on the train for however long it took to get the errands done, but it wasn't running at the moment so instead Deane, Kate and I went to the play area in the food court, another activity I tend to avoid in fear of an altercation with another child over whatever.  But something miraculous happened.  Deane played with first one little boy and then another little girl and then another couple boys.  He played!  He even led some of the interaction.  I took my seat (I usually hover a bit to make sure things aren't getting out of hand) and just watched, cherished the moment.  I overhead him saying "Boy, let's run!" with glee.  He had enough language to play with these 3-5 year olds for about 30 minutes (admittedly, it doesn't take a lot).  There was never an instant where he looked like he wanted to hit someone.  There was no crying or screaming.  He couldn't care less what Kate was doing (the answer was performing her first full on public tantrum, but that's another story). 

She immediately moved the sunglasses to top of her head the first time I put them on her.

When he was hot and pink-cheeked, he came for some water.  He hesitantly agreed to leave to look for the train.  He rode ONE time with my mom and got off with out melting down to come and find me.  He even tried bubble gum while we were at the mall.  These seemingly simple parts of many children's days are milestones for us.  I'm so grateful!

bad photo, but I love this boy and you can kind of see the faintest smile here...he doesn't hate it when I hug him :)

#2 Last night, Chris and I were lucky enough to go on a "date".  It was gorgeous.  We sat outside at the Boat House and watch the skyline fade and the stars come out.  What crazy, wonderful March 16th weather! 

It's water table season!

On our way to the grocery story before heading home (because we're in our 30s and that's what we call a date), we heard "Lead Me" by Sanctus Real.  This song has always spoken to me even though the focus is on a father's role in a family.  In listening, all of these thoughts flashed into my head.
That someday I will be telling my kids that it wasn't until I was 31 that really started to understand what it means to love Jesus first before anyone, even our family.  (I'm not saying this is easy or I have it figured out; only that I can now understand that this is possible and what I want.)
That it's so important for Chris and I to create a family that leads our children in the direction we hope for them, but that they will test that and stray from that path.  That I don't have to keep them from those experiences because I have seen that it is only through hardship that many of us actually come to understand what life is truly about.

I found so much comfort in these thoughts.  Parents, and in particular special needs parents, must protect our children from danger and unnecessary hurt, but recognizing God's role in this is freeing for me.  I have a WHOLE lot of work to do in this area, but I wanted to remember having these feelings for the times when it's not so evident.

Kate trying to get away from me while I take her photo

If you've read my blog for awhile, you are probably sensing that there isn't going to be a lot of consistency in my topic choices.  I'm kind of all over the place with my crafting and interests.  Thanks for sticking around :)

Deane inspecting his own face in one of those things that people had on their desks in the 80s that you could push your hand through....hmmm hows that for a description